I want to start by saying thank you to my friends, family, acquaintances, and strangers that have offered me encouragement to write this blog. I’m sure you’ve noticed I’ve taken my foot off the gas pedal this summer. Partly by design, but also because I haven’t been sure anyone’s really reading it. I’ve realized that is not the case and have over the last month or so realized that people find value in it. The question is/was, do I?
The answer is yes, but it’s been hard to know what direction I want to take it. I originally thought a lifestyle blog was perfect for me; I love to talk about beauty, fashion, shopping, home décor, fitness, etc. But to me, that got old and shallow really quickly. I started to dive into more personal topics such as dating, family issues, etc. I think what I’m realizing now, that like everything in my life, striking a balance will be best.
I want a place of levity for myself and others, but if I pretend I know how to live my or anyone else’s “best life”, well then that’s just simply dishonest and laughable. What I will say though is that with every coming of fall, I’m always inspired to work harder and to produce more. I’d like to rededicate myself to this blog and content creation. I still don’t have what I feel is a winning formula, but as mentioned, your encouragement and feedback is welcome.
Some updates with me?
As you can tell, I’m very excited for the fall season! I’m trying to wear sweaters as much as weather will allow, my nails are a deep purple color, and I’m ordering my hot soy chai and green tea lattes on the regular. And the feeling of energy and buckling down in a good way is back. I quite literally melt with the heat and my brain just isn’t as sharp as it is in cooler weather.
I’ve also begun seeing a therapist. I have no qualms about sharing this openly, because it’s absolutely nothing to be ashamed about and I’d encourage other people to explore this as an option, whether or not they’re at a “rock bottom”. In two sessions, I already feel relief, more positive self-awareness, and the contentedness that comes with trying to be better. For me, the main topic to address is my estrangement from my dad, but it’s been interesting to see how the conversation spiders out to different topics from there. My goal is to break destructive patterns and to be able to accept what I cannot change.
Easier said than done. But I’m trying.
Earlier this week, I had a bit of a stomach bug and it seems to be lingering in an ebb and flow fashion. My stomach doesn’t feel quite right and last night dinner consisted of dandelion tea, Ginger Ale, and Saltine’s. I hate that feeling of nausea. Such a drag. Any other remedy suggestions are welcome. I have been sleeping like a MOFO this weekend. Apparently that was necessary.
Without going into tons of details, I had a nice first date this week as well. A far cry from the trauma of the last two. One cool part was going to Kingston Mines for the first in spite of it being right in my neighborhood. What a cool vibe and great people watching. I enjoyed a Woodford Reserve Old Fashioned and watched the Larry McCray Band jam. There were a hell of a lot of older white people getting down too, ha!
Other than that, I’ve been trying to exercise as much without irritating my stomach. I’ll be heading to Ballet Burn at LPAC in a few hours and then may do some light cardio. The rest of the day brings no specific plans, but I’m okay with that. I hope that you all are enjoying some peace, family time, last hurrahs before summer is over.
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