Halloween Costume Ideas!

It’s mid-October and Halloween is just around the corner! Are you a last minute shopper? Do you hardly have time to even think about it? Well, I’m here to help, no matter how you’re doing it. Solo? With your BAE! In a group of friends? I have got you.


Single

Alexander Hamilton (or basically Lin Manuel Miranda)

I think men and women could totally pull off a goatee and ponytail. Just get some fancy pants and tuck them into boots. Find a long tailed coat and a vest and carry a quill around. If you can rap, rap.

Where to buy? Candle Apple Costumes.

Beatrix Kiddo AKA The Bride AKA Black Mamba

This is personally my fantasy Halloween costume. I would love a yellow jumpsuit and a katana as part of my regular repertoire, but alas, the former is not a great look on everybody and the latter is illegal. Still, this would be so badass!

Where to buy? Google Express for the jumpsuit. Please don’t buy any swords.

Any Britney Spears (but preferably cuckoo Instagram version)

This is really inexpensive because you basically don’t wear clothes, or you can buy from baby Gap. Grab a blonde wig, throw it in a pony and whip it around, girl! Sing and strut in the lobby of your house. See? You don’t even need to go out! Your hot body doesn’t want that candy anyway.

Where to buy? Gap (children or baby section).


Couples

Simon & Garfunkel

This is ideal for couples with a large height discrepancy. Get your tiny in a nice Paul Simon-esque bowl cut and your large tree of a honey in a blonde afro. Pair with Salvation army sweaters, vests, jeans, and grab a ukulele. Fin!

Where to buy? Salvation Army or your local thrift store.

Sup, hair?

Ariana Grande & Pete Davidson

I’m legit so tired of all Kardashian-West, Beiber-Baldwin BS. I want a tiny, infantilized ponytail and a lanky tatted up beanpole to win at love! Seriously. I really like them for some reason and I hope they make it. Plus, you’d basically just wear Reeboks and Sweetener sweats and oversized T-shirts. Almost too comfortable…

Where to buy? Ariana Grande’s website.


Trios & Groups

The Sanderson Sisters

This doesn’t need explaining, really. Hocus Pocus IS Halloween. I’ve thought a lot about who I identify with the most and honestly, I think I’m a Winnie/Sara combo.

Where to buy? Spirit Halloween.

Teeth not included.

Wizard of Oz

Are you one of those gals that thinks they can only be friends with guys because girls don’t like her and guys are so chill and platonic? This is the group costume for you! I tease. This a classic go-to for a reason. Who doesn’t want to be a young lady hanging out with three emotionally damaged old men trying to find her dad or something? At least you can wear ruby slippies, henny!

Where to buy? Wholesale Halloween Costumes.

The Addams Family

There’s literally something for everyone here. We got all body shapes and sizes. If you’re more follicle-challenged, be Fester. If you are hairier than the late Robin Williams (RIP), you are Cousin It, sorry. If you are as pale as me, you can be anyone minus Gomez. Wins all around!

Where to buy? Wholesale Halloween Costumes.

IMG_1071


Lazy

Cat

All you need is some black eyeliner to draw on a nose and whiskers. Then some cat ears and a tail which you can find at your local Halloween pop up or even a Walgreen’s. Done!

Where to buy? I literally just told you. READ!

Ghost

Do you have a sheet that you don’t really use (preferably sans bodily fluids and stains)? Do you have a pair of scissors? That’s it, broseph.

Where to buy? Your house. Or your local sheetery (not a real thing).

Nailed it.

Green Man

Who doesn’t like a nice formfitting bodysuit? LOL. I don’t, but this is a very basic, no frills costume that still packs a big punch and protects your skin from the cold. Literally. All of your skin.

Where to buy? Amazon.

Sweet bulge, Green Man!

Whatever you decide to do, be safe and brush your teeth. Also, here are some of my Halloween blasts from the pasts…


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