Winter Blues

It’s been a really odd week, to say the least. The dangerous weather in Chicago on Wednesday and Thursday left a lot of people cooped up in their homes for safety. On Wednesday, I did not leave my apartment one time, even though it looked beautiful outside with bright, clear blue skies and an appearance by the deceptively warm looking Sun. On Thursday, I ventured out twice for food and exercise with my entire face shielded from the bitter wind.

Work has been so busy so far this year that by the time Friday night rolls around, I feel as if my brain is on the fritz and all I want to do is lay prostrate in bed and watch mindless cartoons on Netflix. I spent yesterday in a similar fashion. I opted to allow myself to sleep late after waking up at 7am per usual, do brief workout at the gym, nap for a couple, then get a facial. Today, I woke up feeling refreshed physically, but just kind of down. Of course when it’s safe to go outside again at a balmy 40 degrees Fahrenheit (you should see the sandals and t-shirts out here), it’s super gray and gloomy.

I feel stir crazy and I’m craving a change of scenery. This is no surprise as I usually feel this way every year around this time. I find that I’m still not nailing the balance between restful alone time and getting out there. It doesn’t help that I’m not a big sports fan and today is probably the biggest day of the year for sports. Instagram doesn’t help either. Scrolling through stories of people in Costa Rica, Mexico, and Europe make me feel jealous and more claustrophobic in my apartment, that I am also very tired of.

I guess it’s a matter of doing things, which I’m not doing. Does that make sense? I work really hard at my job and staying on top of the day to day responsibilities, but I rarely venture outside of my comfort zone. For example, I don’t travel hardly at all even though I want to. I don’t go to concerts or parties where I hardly know anyone.

Taking risks like this usually pay off if there’s anxiety or even dread surrounding it initially. It’s kind of like working out; once you do it, you’re so glad you did. But I’m fighting against the sort of apathy and counterintuitive reclusiveness this time of the year brings. I’m lucky to have some upcoming plans that are really fun, but it’s feeling like it’s not enough. Luckily, I do have writing this blog as an outlet. I’m grateful for that!

Is anyone else in the same boat?


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