It’s been an intense summer in a few ways, not so much for me directly. I have witnessed a close friend experience the joy of getting married to their partner and soul mate. I’ve also been witness to a close friend working through a major, devastating loss. It’s caused me to be both introspective, but also appreciative of the grace that my friends possess. Both situations were truly life-defining to them.
My empathy for my friends comes from the gratitude stemming from their willingness to share their vulnerability with me, including their great happiness and extreme pain. Having deep friendships is life-affirming because, at the end of the day, I believe that relationships are the legacy we leave behind. My therapist once quoted Maya Angelou to me:
I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.
To me, the biggest gift my friends can give me is their vulnerability and being open to experiencing mine. The opportunity to be authentic is important to me. I love my job as a recruiter, but there is an element of needing to be “on”. Sometimes I just want to be low-key and the not so perky life of the party. Sometimes, I want to talk about myself. They let me and I never feel judged. Also, if I’m not up to hanging out or don’t respond to their outreach right away, I am comforted in knowing that they don’t take it personally.
As I look for romantic connections, I do feel sustained by my friendships. I don’t feel I need to settle for poor quality because I know what quality relationships should feel like. This post is an opportunity to say to my close friends that I appreciate you all so much and I feel very lucky to be a part of your experiences, both happy and sad. Thank you!
Thanks for reading. To get new post notifications for Oh | Hey, subscribe with your email address and follow me on Instagram at ohhey__megan.